Recap
A defensible thesis is a claim that needs a defence and can be defended. It is arguable, specific, focused, reasoned and responsive to the task. It may preview the structure of the argument, but it need not. Avoid announcements, facts, restated prompts, vague evaluations, lists of devices and overreach.
Qualities of a strong thesis
| Quality | Test |
|---|---|
| Arguable | Could a reasonable person disagree? |
| Specific | Does it name the group, action or effect? |
| Focused | Can I defend it in the space I have? |
| Reasoned | Does it give or imply a reason (“because”)? |
| Responsive | Does it answer the question asked? |
Weak shapes
- Announcement: “In this essay I will discuss…”
- Fact: “Pollution is a problem.”
- Restated prompt with no position.
- Vague evaluation: “This speech is very effective.”
- Unconnected list of devices.
- Overreach: “This will solve all problems.”
Useful patterns
- Claim + reason: “Cities should close their centres to cars because the gains in air quality outweigh the inconvenience.”
- Concession + claim: “Although cars bring convenience, … “
- Claim + qualification: “…, with exceptions for residents and deliveries, …”
- Rhetorical analysis: “[Writer] uses [strategies] to [accomplish purpose] for [audience].”
Worked mini-example
Draft: “City centres and cars are a big problem today.” Revised: “City centres should be closed to private cars, with exceptions for residents and deliveries, because the gains in air quality and pedestrian safety outweigh the inconvenience to drivers.”
Rhetorical analysis of Lincoln, Gettysburg (1863): “By stressing that the living cannot add to what the dead have already consecrated, Lincoln uses humility, repetition and a turn to ‘us the living’ to transform a memorial into a call to continue ‘the unfinished work’.” It says what the choices accomplish, not only what they are.
Four revision questions
- Could a reasonable person disagree?
- Is it specific enough?
- Does it say why?
- Can I defend it with the time and space I have?
Where this appears on the exam
- Multiple choice (writing): which sentence would make the best thesis for a draft; which revision makes a thesis more specific or arguable.
- All three essays: a defensible position, not a restatement of the prompt, earns the thesis point in a suggested Marlbridge rubric.
- Rhetorical analysis: the thesis should say what the writer’s choices accomplish, not just list them.
Mistakes to avoid
- Writing a plan instead of a position.
- Restating the prompt and stopping.
- Naming devices without saying what they accomplish.
- Making the thesis so broad that nothing could prove it.
- Forcing a three-point preview that does not fit your evidence.
- Treating a question as a thesis.
Quick self-check
- What are the two demands on a defensible thesis? It needs a defence (arguable) and can be defended (specific and supportable).
- Is “This essay will discuss recycling” a thesis? No: it announces a topic.
- What word is key in a rhetorical analysis thesis? “To”: it says what the choices accomplish.
- Must a thesis preview the structure? No: previews are optional.
- Improve “Zoos are bad.” For example: “Zoos should be phased out because they cannot meet the needs of large, wide-ranging animals.”
For the full explanation and worked examples, return to the study guide.